Reviews by Kryptic Centurion

All reviews - Movies (67) - TV Shows (18) - Books (6) - Games (30)

"lolol you call that drifting?"

Posted : 1 year, 9 months ago on 18 February 2008 07:26 (A review of The Fast and the Furious: Tokyo Drift)

This film is absolutely horrible. I feel ashamed. How many non-Japanese people live in Japan? A lot by this film and they all live in the same area! The main girl is so wooden that her bark could be convincing.

I always hated games like Drift Racer and a film about drifting fuels the fire! How easy ws it to raise money aswell for a new car? So easy, thats more Yen than I could count and accumulate in a lifetime.

Its only saving grace was Toretto's cameo. He was the only thing that made this franchise kick-off.

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Times 1000!!!

Posted : 1 year, 9 months ago on 15 February 2008 06:51 (A review of Sailor Moon)

I cannot remember for the life of me why I managed to watch numerous episodes of this show.

Its main redeeming feature was Tuxedo Mask and his awesome theme tune. Although, back then I couldn't find it on Kazaa :(. Now I realise he is very similar to the Angel character from the Buffy series.

The villains in this were annoying aswell. I remember two androgenous homosexuals and another guy called Malicite (H) who were always up to no good.

I wouldn't recommend it to anyone unless they are into girl power, very young girls at that!!

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I remember you.

Posted : 1 year, 9 months ago on 8 February 2008 09:45 (A review of Heroes)

This show is a friendly mix between Lost and the 4400. The coincidental connection between the main cast mixed with evolutionary abilities!

I waited for the whole first season to finish before I started to watch them all in a row, which I am quite glad I did. The first few eps were so slow that I defo wouldn't have tuned in every week.

This kind of show requires a constant stream to keep it at the top. It has so much more to offer.

Zachary Quinto has been superb since his introduction in the series and it wouldn't be the same without him.

Keep 'um coming!

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Do you believe?

Posted : 1 year, 9 months ago on 8 February 2008 09:38 (A review of Lost)

I've watched this show since the beginning. I'm invested now and I just wanna see how it ends.

It may be confusing and lead you on but it has enough coverage in the media and contraversy to keep the viewership up.

I can see how it pisses people off. That it is too mainstream for the niches but not every show is meant for everyone.

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Front to Back Life

Posted : 1 year, 9 months ago on 8 February 2008 09:28 (A review of The Cuckoo Clock of Doom (Goosebumps Series))

During my youth I was encouraged to go to the library to read as part of a readership scheme. There would be a trolley of selected books which you would have a week to read and then come back, write something about it and then pick the next.

The first book I picked was the only Goosebumps on the rack. I finished this book by the next day!

For a younger readership, I'll always remember it as a enthralling adventure. I couldn't put it down and wnjoyed every second. I even went back to it afterwards to read the chapters I liked since I had 6 days left before I went back to the library.

The story is from the perspective from an ordinary young lad. His parents by a Cuckoo Clock which has a secret. After messing around with it, he realises that the secret is the clock is making him travel back in time. He relives his life at integral stages but has to figure how to stop before he experiences pre-life!

The twist at the end is the real kicker! I highly recommend for anyone who wants an easy and nostalgic read.

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I'll fight whoever just to fight.

Posted : 1 year, 9 months ago on 8 February 2008 09:17 (A review of Light a Last Candle)

This book was recommended to me by my Dad. Most books he take interest in are turn of the century crime or American Revolution related so when he handed it to me I wa a bit :-S.

He knew I just finished reading I Am Legend so he gave me the book as it is of a similar theme. The End of Civilisation.

I was thoroughly impressed. The book details the life of the Last Free Man on Earth after a brutal alien invasion. This post-apocalyptic world is not like we know it. The remains of the human race have been modified to the aliens will, the patrolling saucers devastate all who oppose and the weather is no longer constant.

A very interesting read if only to find out how it all turns out for the Ice Lover.

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SK in Triplicate

Posted : 1 year, 9 months ago on 8 February 2008 08:29 (A review of Suikoden III)

This game was a different take on the Suikoden format but it was by no means the wrong move.

The Trinity System allows the player to choose which order they want to play the story in.

There are 3 main characters: Hugo, Geddoe and Chris. All Unique and each have their own chapters to play. With so many crossovers and quests to partake its a shame that this was never released in the UK!

In contrast to other SK Titles, the Chief Star of Heaven isn't the lead character. The character Thomas fills this role but its more due to the fact that he owns the Castle Headquarters which brings the 108 Stars together.

The Destroyers were a fantastic amalgamation of villains that the series has ever seen. Power, Knowledge, Magic. They had everything and they were so close to succeeding which makes the Trinity Heroes struggle more of a challenge.

Another Classic from the Konami Series.

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I'm not voting for anyone!

Posted : 1 year, 9 months ago on 8 February 2008 04:43 (A review of Napoleon Dynamite)

I'm inclined to agree with the person below me.

There are worse films out there but this film doesn't do much to keep out of the bracket.

Jon Heder pulls off the 'Kevin the Teenager' routine poorly and then doesn't really resolve or change anything. The dance is not at all amusing.

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Northern Woe

Posted : 1 year, 9 months ago on 7 February 2008 05:20 (A review of Flashdance)

I loved the soundtrack (very retro for me.)

However, the whole film made me feel depressed. Like a classic Northern British film. I did enjoy the ending, it gave the film the lift it needed but too late.

It also makes me wonder why films like this are made. Where the entire outset is depressing and its not until the climax that you actually understand there is hope. I don't want to say this film is pointless but I felt it add nothing but years to my life.

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Donnie Darko TV

Posted : 1 year, 9 months ago on 5 February 2008 03:01 (A review of Life on Mars)

Though I am British and love to support my countries attempts to breach out in the new media market, with this route they are doomed to suffer.

Take a generic time travel idea and mix in taboos and a poor cast and this is exactly what you get on Mars.

It tries to be intelligent, it tries to be funny but I feel nothing but shame. Its like watching a drunk uncle at a party. Ashes to Ashes should never see the light of day.

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